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Why Am I Here?

 Life is full of ups and downs. One day you love your job, the next day you come home and eat a tub of ice cream. One day you're thriving as a mom, the next hiding in the bathroom while those mini-yous watch TV. Life is unsteady, and emotionally we are unsteady. Contentment in your place, whether its the life you dreamed of or not, can be a hard fight for self-control and joy. How many of us have asked the question why am I even here?? Probably everyone if they've lived long enough. 

We may not be asking why am I here? as in, why do I exist in this world? rather, we may be asking why am I here? as in, why am I in this house, at this job, at this collage, at this church, living in this town? The latter are questions that I ask. Sometimes, when I listen to the way I feel, I feel that this home, this job, this church, this town are all a bit much, a little too hard, a little pointless, so why am I here anyway?

Last week I finished reading the New Testament and circled back to read through the minor prophets, starting with Daniel. It's been a while since I read Daniel and wowie is it a doozy. Following the fiery furnace and lions' den, the latter part of Daniel contains various strange visions that God gives to His faithful servant. My understanding of these visions is next to nothing, but chapter 7 did breath some encouragement into my heart right when I needed it. 

I kept looking in the night visions, and behold, with the clouds of heaven, One like a Son of Man was coming, and He came up to the Ancient of Days and was presented before Him. And to Him was given dominion, glory and a kingdom, that all the peoples, nations and men of every language might serve Him. His dominion is an everlasting dominion which will not pass away; and His kingdom is one which will never be destroyed...But the saints of the Highest One will receive the kingdom and possess the kingdom forever, for all ages...I kept looking, and the horn was waging war with the saints and overpowering them, until the Ancient of Days came and judgement was passed in favor of the saints of the Highest One, and the time arrived when the saints took possession of the kingdom. Daniel 7:13-14, 18, 21-22 NASB

The reality in which we live is one containing two kingdoms: the Kingdom of Light ruled by the Ancient of Days and Son of Man, and the kingdom of darkness ruled by the Prince of the Power of the Air. 

Because of Jesus birth, obedience, life, death, resurrection, and ascension, because He has paid for all my sins by nailing them to the cross and canceling the written code against me (Col 2:13-14) I have been transferred from the kingdom of death into His kingdom of marvelous light (Col 1:13). I am now one of the saints that Daniel's vision talks about, a saint who the powers of darkness wage war against, but who is ultimately secure because the Ancient of Days, God the Father, will pass judgement in my favour and, with the rest of His people, I will take possession of the kingdom. 

Today, whether your question is why am I here? as in, why am I alive? or why am I here? as in, why am I in this home, job, church, etc. if you are a Christian you are a Kingdom of Light person, and you are here to enjoy and praise your God and build His kingdom. 

Maybe you build His kingdom by praying for your unsaved co-workers and then show up for work knowing you are representing Jesus to them, maybe you do it by praying for your neighbours and bringing them meals or flowers or just being available to chat, maybe you do it by praying for your children and then teaching them how to obey and love Jesus as best you can with the help of the Holy Spirit, maybe you do it by praying from your hospital bed. Like with building a house, not all are plumbers or electricians or stone masons, but all are building the same house. Our Builder is God (Heb. 11:10), He tells us what and how to build, but our jobs are not all the same. 

I am here for the same reason that you are here, dear Christian sister, to love and serve the Ancient of Days and build His kingdom. And when my emotions turn blue I must pray for forgiveness, ask for joy, and get up to do the work before me. Life is not a pointless reptation of work and laundry and dishes, life is full of kingdom work for a kingdom that will never pass away. God is a strategic general, He puts His soldiers where they need to be. That's why you're here. 


What I'm Reading 

    • Crossway has a series of Short Classics that I've been enjoying. Recently finished Fighting for Holiness by JC Ryle.
    • Be Thou My Vision by Jonathan Gibson has been a help in private worship a couple mornings a week
    • I'm almost done From The Ashes by Jesse Thistle, a memoir by a Metis-Cree man. It's intense, mostly about his drug additions so far.
    • Still Alice was our most recent read for book club and I didn't like it, but everyone else did...well, except for Tara. Everyone liked it except for me and Tara. 
    • Listening to My All Knotted Up Life  by Beth Moore. The author reads it.

What I'm Enjoying

    • With the return of the cooler weather my hot tea drinking has taken a resurgence. My current favourites are probably Cream Earl Grey in the morning and a Sleepy Tea before bed
    • Just got a wet Swiffer duster. It's a game changer for keeping my white floor white.
    • Apples, so fresh!
    • Teaching piano. Just finished our 3rd week back at lessons and I'm loving it!

O Master, let me walk with Thee// in lowly paths of service free.// Tell me Thy secret, help me bear// the wait of toil, the fret of care. Washington Gladden, 1879


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