by jot and tittle

 We humans must be a nostalgic bunch because it's the last day of 2022 and everywhere I find people posting highlights from the year that's almost behind us. Oh well, I'm about to join them.  This morning as I was praying I found myself giving a great deal of thanks for this past year. Yes, yes, I cried this year too. That surprises no one as I'm pretty sure only screen doors were installed to keep my tears at bay. No matter. I heard somewhere that tears are healing. But I don't want to talk about the sad things, I want to share a couple of lists of good things that I either discovered or am simply thankful. Thanks Another year is over and I spent it with wonderful friends who do real life with me. I am grateful for the cups of tea, carpooling, book club, walks, paddle boarding, meals, texts, and conversations. God is kind to create us with the ability to love so many people so deeply.  I received a new niece and nephew this past year. Most of my friends had babies,...

We had weathered the upheaval relatively well--perhaps too well--because just as it seemed the dust was settling upon our broader society, a hurricane swept down upon our little church.  I was reading the book of Job at the time (somehow it's always Job at times like that) and as I read God's question "having you considered my servant Job?" I could hear a similar question; "have you considered my little church over here?" What would God have said of us? See how they minister to their community. See how they are obeying their principles and consciences. See how they love each other. And what would Satan reply? They only love each other because they attend the same building, but if you allow me to bring in a conflict to separate them, you'll see how quickly all the niceness falls away.  I don't know if that conversation happened, but I do know that our little church had a split just over a year ago. We held to our principles and obeyed our consciences,...

There are good men in the world. There's my father. He invests in the lives of his children, plays with his grandchildren, and talks to people at church--friends and visitors alike. There's my brothers. They work hard to support their families. They are good dads. There's my first boss who taught me how to work hard and how to lead in the work place by giving clear instruction and by doing the jobs that other people don't want to do. There are my elders who pray about my questions before providing clear, biblical instruction.  There are good men in the world, and the ones who do the majority of day-to-day life with me are married to my friends.  It is a great kindness of the Lord that we do not do life alone, and it is a great kindness that, in the church, we get to be family. My friend's husband is also my brother, and our relationship is that of healthy siblings. The faith-brothers in my life are protective and kind, they dish out and accept teasing, they do not m...

There are people I follow on social media who are way cooler than I am. (I know, I know, there are fakers on social media. The thing is, for the most part, I think these women are not faking it.) They honestly just get so much more done than I do. There's the mom who has her time so well scheduled that the amount of stuff she gets done in a day amazes me. There's the woman who consumes an astronomical number of books because she listens to audio books while she runs errands. There's the woman homeschooling her kids and making bread and keeping her house clean and running a side business and writing a book and leading a workout class and leading Bible study and volunteering at the nursing home and and and.  I was praying about this because I really feel like in comparison, I don't get much done. I can't listen to audio books all the time because my brain is tired. I can't run at 110% all day, fall into bed, and get up and do it all over again the next day. But he...

A couple weeks ago, while I tidied up after camping (yes, I went camping again), I wanted to listen to Scripture and the Old Testament prophets seemed to be calling my name, so Hosea it was (for no other purpose then that I could listen to it in 35 minutes and that was the perfect amount of time). For the following week, I returned to it, reading it this time, and soaking it in a bit more.  One of the themes in Hosea is that God called His people to know His law and obey it, but the people did not know the law so they did not obey, and this brought them destruction and discipline; "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge." 4:6a. "Their deeds will not allow them to return to their God. For a spirit of harlotry is within them, and they do not know the LORD." 5:4. "Israel has rejected the good." 8:3a "Though I wrote for him ten thousand precepts of My law, they are regarded as a strange thing." 8:12 But it is the end of 9:10 that struck me thi...

It has occurred to me recently that as I get older, so does everyone else, and that as I complete my third decade of earthly existence, others have completed their second. Sometimes it feels that we grow in age little by little; eighteen to nineteen, nineteen to twenty, and sometimes it feels like our age jumps while we were looking the other way; twenty-five to twenty-seven, twenty-seven to thirty. I am in the later category. I'm mean, just last week I was twenty-one...and then I went camping and woke up as a thirty-year-old. Craziness.  The physical responses to camping are not, however, the only differences between twenty-one and thirty.  As I listen to younger women converse about their dreams for marriage and children--which is almost always followed by the lament that there are no men to fulfil the husband's part of the covenant--there are a few things that I wish someone had told twenty-one year old me...things that I now offer to you.  Now, there are two different...

You know what? I'm tired. Maybe you're tired too. I feel like the well that contains my thoughts and ideas is mostly dry. I climb down into this well and shout "anyone got anything?" no one replies, and I climb back out and find a snack.  The other day I was listening to a podcast that John Eldridge was on (this is not an endorsement of John Eldridge. He sounds like a lovely human being and I believe he loves Jesus, but if you listen to him or read his books, do it with a grain of salt...well...maybe a lot of salt). Anyway, the grain of salt that he offered me was that post pandemic, people are exhausted. We simply don't have the reserves to deal with life. For example, I can meet my friends for a spur-the-moment picnic, but I mentally can't handle extensive traveling.  Maybe that's how you feel too. The play-date at the park is fantastic, the BBQ with 82 people that you don't know makes your pulse quicken and you want to run the other way.  That's...

  Some day in Heaven, when we see God face to face,  we'll understand He loves us; worms brought near by grace. Satisfied beyond understanding,  with God's love we shall be,  with no more doubts or questions,  perfectly set free. In His light we'll see light. We'll see the beauty of His love, shining on us from eternity past, Forever, never-ending, from above. Believe Him now, repentant sinner, believe His love is true. It does not waver, does not wander,  it is directed, poured out, upon you. 

 Looking for some books to read over the summer? Here is a quick list to get you started! Biography/Autobiography  By Searching by Isobel Kuhn (Isobel Kuhn's autobiography)  Jungle Pilot by Russell T. Hitt (biography about Nate Saint)  Rediscovering the Church Fathers by Michael A.G. Haykin The Boys in the Boat by Daniel James Brown (about the American Rowing Team that went to the Olympics in Berlin right before WW2)   Novel The Book Woman of Troublesome Creek by Kim Michele Richardson (about the blue people of Kentucky)  Watership Down by Richard Adams  The Tanglewood's Secret by Patricia St. John (this is a YA novel, but it's beautiful)  Tuck Everlasting by Natalie Babbitt (again, a YA novel but the writing is amazing) Out of My Mind by Sharon M. Draper  Educational/Help books  Love Thy Body  by Nancy Pearcy  A Brief Theology of Periods (yes, really) by Rachel Jones  Suffering is Never for Nothing by Elisa...

“Okay everyone, we’ve talked about rhyming words all week," Eva stood before her grade three class before lunch on Friday. "Can anyone give me an example of three words that rhyme? Yes, Jayne.”           “Snail, wale, hail.”           “Good. Peter.”           “Truck, stuck, luck.”           “Good. Pac.”           “Rake,” Pac said with a grin. “Umm, fake,” his voice held a note of mirth. “Snake,” he let out a giggle.           Eva narrowed her eyes at him. “Why did you choose those words, Pac?”           “I was…inspired,” Pac said triumphantly, finding the word he wanted.           “By what…” Eva stopped when she saw p...

Come to Me, oh weary one, and I will give you rest. Hand Me every weight of sin, every trouble in your breast. I came to seek and to save, such a one as you. I came to bear your burdens,  and griefs and sorrows too.  I shall not give them back to you so leave them here with me. I am strong and you are weak,  leave them, don't you see? You cannot pay for your sins and your griefs are far too great, but I made all with a word, so let Me take their weight.  Along with all your burdens I will also carry you, You are not strong, I am All in all, Trust me, it is true.  Weary one, stop striving, I will give you peace within. The Comforter is in you,  Depend on Me and God and Him.  We shall never leave you, Three Best Friends are We, so lay down the griefs and take my hand We are with you forevermore and constantly. 

People are lonely. Sometimes I'm tempted to think that my sister in Christ who has a husband and children could not possibly be lonely, but that's not true. People in all walks of life are are lonely; single, married, children, elderly, all different types of people are lonely.  "No one told me how lonely being a mom with two little kids would be." "I didn't expect to be living alone in my late twenties." "When our youngest moved out and I retired the same year, I wasn't prepared for how quiet the house would be, for how lonely I am." Have you ever said something like that?  I moved out when I was twenty, first living with my brother (who was always gone on the weekends) and then living with a couple other girls. At this point I've lived alone for four and a half years. There are times when I have known that sad desperation of feeling like I was friendless.  The first thing to do is to tell God. "God, I am lonely." It's ok...

 "One of the things that I wasn't prepared for as a wife and mother is how monotonous life is. Every day I do the dishes and vacuum and fold laundry and sometimes its hard to be content with the same old, same old." So said the young women before me, with our other friend nodding in agreement.  "And your toddler doesn't thank you for folding the laundry again, does he?" Both smiled.  I guess that's something most of us haven't been prepared for; the monotony of life. The fairy tales and hallmark movies all end with the prince sweeping the princess off her feet...they don't have anything to say about waking every two hours to feed a baby or paying the same bills. In her autobiography, Isobel Kuhn says     "Life does contain moments of adventure, but these times are interspersed with long periods of plain, unvarnished hard work. The real things of life are attained at these monotonous level periods, so to      speak, more than they are at the...

Bible reading and prayer are the two bedrock spiritual disciplines. How do we know who God is unless we read His word? And how do we have a relationship with Him unless we talk to Him? Simply put, private worship is the foundation of all other Christian activity. Yes, private worship is the foundation from which all other spiritual disciplines can either flourish and wilt. When private worship is in place, family worship and public worship are given the soil they need to thrive.  Perhaps it is helpful to liken the necessity of private worship to the necessity for spouses to spend time together. If the only time a wife spoke to her husband was when their children or friends were present, it would result in a shallow relationship. So too with God. On my side, there are sins to confess and experiences to relate and feelings to share that are  not appropriate or helpful for others to be party to, and from the Lord's side there is affection and rebuke and encouragement to be given ...

 Grief is a strange beast. Sometimes it lies sleeping in the sun like a large cat, content to leave you alone, and sometimes it springs itself on you from out of nowhere, leaving you no time to recover before the tears or anger take over and you're lost, swallowed whole by the tabby that turned out to be a lion. You can go about your life on Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday with a spring in your step and then wake up on Friday overcome by sadness. Nothing has objectively changed, the grief that lives inside of you has simply decided to wake up, stretch, and come out.  I say all that in order to let you know that if you have these feelings, you are not alone.  Just before Christmas I encountered a sleepless night. Finally, at 3:30am I got up, made a cup of tea, and sat on the rug in my living room to talk to God. I told Him all of it. I told Him that I don't understand how the last six months (or the last two years) could be for our good and His glory. I to...