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This Life

Crossing the street from the pool entrance to my parked car, I looked into the park. In the dusk and after-rain light the grass looked greener and the air smelled of dirt and worms and growing things. In this moment the question suddenly came to me: do you like your life? Perhaps my post-exercise mind was just more awake and present than it had been in a while, but the thought came as it was, walking into my mind with a comfortable smile and taking a seat to stay for a while. 

Do you like your life?

My life is a mix of my decisions and my response to circumstances outside of my control, and it is not what child and teenager me ever planned or dreamed of. I'm guessing that it is easier for each of us to think about things that we dislike in our lives than the things we like, but this morning during prayer I was reminded that God is good and He is good to me, including the parts of my life that I'm not a fan of. 

When I start with the goodness of God, it is harder to concentrate on the things I don't like. It is hard to consciously believe that God is good and does good and then complain about the things God has done. 



Heavenly Father, thank You for making me single. You have taught me so much through the loneliness, the need to make independent decisions, the need to depend on You. You have been there in the middle of the night when I can't sleep and You have been there for every humorous moment others have missed. You have lived my whole life with me. Thank You. 

Thank You for my apartment, for my occupations, for my friends. My cup overflows with friends. And thank You for all the little people in my life. My cup overflows with kids too.   

Thank You for a body that can do all the things I need it to do, from working to paddle boarding to playing with all those kids. Thank You for a mind and imagination and the ability to read. Thank You for the ability to enjoy things. 

Thank You for this life, this life that I would never have chosen but You have planned it out perfectly. Thank You for the hurts and sorrows, the joys and celebrations, and the ever day life that You are living with me. You are good and You do good. You do good to me. Thank You. 

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