A couple weeks ago I spoke a story on Instagram that received mixed reviews. I was talking about all the happy reels that people had posted, summing up their 2023. Birthdays, weddings, ultrasounds, babies, vacations, all the things. And I said that if you had posted a happy reel that was great, I'm glad you had a good 2023, but I just wanted to say a few things to the people who didn't post a happy reel because they did not have a happy 2023. For some people 2023 was incredibly hard. Then I talked about Psalm 136. You know that one. The refrain goes "for His mercy endures forever."
Here's a brief summery of the mixed responses. The people who had a difficult 2023 messaged me saying "thank you for giving voice to our feelings." The people who had a great 2023 responded that its fine to post about one's own happiness even if other people had a difficult time. And you know what, they're both right and maybe I'll talk about that in later blog posts. But there was a third group of people, people who had been to funerals and suffered financial loss and who were grieving a variety of things, but they still posted happy reels because along with the suffering there is good, there is blessing. God took these people through deep waters and laid a crushing burden on their backs but they still saw how He was leading them to a place of abundance (Psalm 66), so they decided to focus on the good.
And that was a very good reminder to me to simply see the good. I found 2023 to be quite difficult, partly because I'm a late processor and 2021-2022 were very difficult so I'm still responding to those things, and partly because I lost things and people who are important to me. In many ways 2023 was a year of processing previous loss and grieving new loss. However, in the midst of the lament, there is much good.
First of all, God has drawn me closer and taught me more about Him as my Keeper and Refuge then I knew before. He is my primary shepherd. He is the light when all other light goes out. And in the darkness of loss, His light becomes brighter.
Secondly, there were a lot of good things that happened in 2023 that ought not be crowded out by the losses. Two new nieces joined my family, plus many of my friends had babies. My paddleboard was put to good use from April-October. All summer I did aqua cycling at the outdoor pool in town. Book Club faithfully met. My friends and I went to the Maritimes for a week in August. From January-June a few of my friends met to do an escape room each month, which is hilarious and so random. My cup overflows with friends and I can't count the number of visits I did. I read 59 books and met my savings goal. In short, my life in 2023 was full of blessings.
There is good. It just takes practice to see it.
After a couple kind rebukes from godly women, reminding me that happy reels don't mean everything is amazing, it just means there were things to celebrate in the midst of the mess and sadness. It means people chose to see the good. And you know what? I need to been more intentional about seeing the good, to worship, to give thanks.
I needed the reminder to see the good, and maybe you do too. Seeing the good does not negate all the hard, but it does help remove the hard from the all-encompassing place it wants to hold, and places it in its proper place. Not everything is grief. Not everything is hard.
"Come and hear; all you who fear God, and I will declare what He has done for my soul. I cried to Him with my mouth, and He was extolled with my tongue. If I regard iniquity in my heart, the Lord will not hear. But certainly God has heard me; He has attended to the voice of my prayer. Blessed be God, who has not turned away from my prayer, nor His mercy from me!" Psalm 66:16-20 NKJV
What I'm Reading
- By The Standing Stone by Maxine Trottier
- 5 Minutes in Church History by Stephen J. Nichols (It's also a podcast if you'd rather listen)
- A Great Reckoning by Louise Penny (I'm back on the Louise Penny train after taking a break for the summer. Her Inspector Gamache is from Quebec, and being Canadian, I've really enjoyed this series. There is some language and some gay characters, so mind your conscience)
- The Mortification of Sin by John Owen
- Take Heart Daily Devotions to Deepen Your Faith by David Powilson
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