Skip to main content

But what does God want?

I recently read 2 articles that have been floating around facebook. One talks about what women want in a godly man and the other is about what men want in a godly woman. The first talks about how men should be honest, pure, strong, compassionate, and humble and the second says that women should be real, confident, beautiful (in spirit), and passionate. These articles were interesting and insightful if those are the only questions you want answers to. (and I did find that the one to men didn't really convey what I would like in my husband). But the real question for Christians is what does God want in a godly man or godly woman?

To answer this question in depth I would encourage you to read the entire Bible. If you would like a shorter answer please turn to 1 Timothy 2:8-11 and Titus 2:5-6.

We'll begin with men. In this chapter Paul tells Timothy "I want men everywhere to lift up holy hands in prayer, without anger or disputing." Matthew Henry explains that men are to pray everywhere; in their closets, around their dining tables, in the car, everywhere. They are to live in close fellowship with their God, talking to Him everywhere and being an example to those around them. Paul tells Titus to "encourage the young men to be self controlled". They aren't to be proud, but should use the energy God gave them in their youth with wisdom. God wants men who pray and are self controlled and if that's what God wants in a man, then that's what a godly woman should want in a man too.

Paul moves on to talk about the women. They are to dress decently and not be preoccupied with how they look but should instead be busy doing good works. They are told to learn, but to do so quietly without ruling over men (Timothy 2). Paul tells Titus that the older women should teach the young women to be self-controlled, pure, busy at home, kind, and subject to their husbands (assuming you don't have a husband you should be subject to your father and the leaders of your church). God wants women who are more preoccupied with heavenly matters than earthly treasures. Men, that's what you should want in a woman too.

You see (and this may sound strange) but it really doesn't matter so much what you want in a man or woman. Yes, some things are nice; if he has dark hair, if she's slim, if he likes to go for walks, if she can cook, if, if, if... But those things are not overly important. What you, godly young person, should desire in your spouse is that he/she is godly. You must both love God more than you love anyone or anything else. Before you make a list of qualities you want in your mate, perhaps you should seek out God's opinion. After all, the reason you are on this earth is to bring Him glory and the reason you will get married is for His glory; you might as well start out on the right foot by desiring (and being) the person He wants you to be.

And once you know what God's standards are don't compromise them. Yes, He works in us all differently and teaches us different things. One girl may be learning how to submissive while another is learning to be kind. But the point must be she's learning. Your future spouse does not have to be perfect (because then you will never get married) but she/he does need to want to be perfect because it's what God wants.

So as you live your life, live in the light of this question; is this who God wants me to be?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Actually, I'm engaged

If you are a Christian you are part of the greatest love story every told to mankind. This story begins with God speaking and it ends with an "amen". It's found between the covers of this book called "The Bible" and if you haven't read it I suggest you begin immediately because you will be amazed at the love recorded there. If you are a Christian you are described as a member of God's church and if you are a member of His church you are also part of the Bride of Christ (Ephesians 5). You might say that Israel in the Old Testament was God's church and He made His love story very clear to them as well...though not because they deserved it. Song of Solomon tells the deep, intimate love of Christ for His church and the adoration of the church for Jesus; it's the story of how it should always be . Sadly, in a few books later we read a story that is heart wrenching. Ezekiel 16 is titled "The Lord's Faithless Bride" because this bride, t...

Surprise Sin

Over Easter weekend I had the opportunity to visit my grandparents. We caught up over soup and egg salad sandwiches and then migrated to the living room with cups of tea. Gradually the conversation turned to a couple young siblings from their church whom they've observed seldom fight. Sometimes these kids do get angry or annoyed with each other and then they fight, but that is not their normal relationship. My grandfather made this observation, "isn't that just like sin? You are living your life of obedience and then all of a sudden its like sin gets the better of you." It was a comforting statement coming from my elderly grandfather who has been walking with the Lord for over 80 years. Even as a seasoned saint, sin still creeps up on him. But it has also made me think quite a bit. Sometimes I am tempted to think that if I do everything right (regular devotions, get enough sleep, listen to good music, eat well, have Christian fellowship, exercise) then I won't fal...

Delayed Grief

 Grief is a crazy thing. Sometimes you cry till you fall asleep, sometimes you're angry, sometimes you can't feel anything, and sometimes you're so, so tried. Grief is also unpredictable in that it can take a long time to heal...and sometimes it feels like its been healed and then you're crying on your way home from the grocery store and you aren't even sure why. Grief is not logical and polite and convenient. It interrupts our lives on its terms. A couple mornings ago I was thinking about how tired I am. I'm not weepy or angry or even really sad, just tired, and this tiredness is physical, mental, and emotional. Which surprises me because my life is actually really great and I haven't had anything in recent months to be sad about. However, the more I contemplated it,  I think the tiredness is a long term symptom of a deep sadness that I lived in a couple years ago. Which is the first thing I wanted to share with you. Maybe, like me, there has been nothing r...