Skip to main content

Fill Up My Love-Cup

In his book, The Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman speaks primarily to spouses about the different ways to love each other. He categorizes how we love each other into 5 different sections; touch, acts of service, time, words of affirmation, and gifts. The issue he deals with is that different people have different love languages. It can be frustrating to be married to (or friends with someone) whose primary love language is touch while yours is gifts. He encourages people to learn the love language of their spouse; and I would like to add to this by encouraging my readers to learn the love languages of their friends and family.

I've always enjoyed the concept of love languages because it's interesting to see how God made us all differently. Over the past several weeks I've been thinking about them when it comes to single people, specifically who fills up a single person's love cup? Then I thought about who fills up my love cup and the answer was so beautiful that I thought I should share it; God does. Even cooler than that, God speaks all the love languages.

1. Touch; He lives inside His people (1 Corinthians 2:10-12; 3:16)
2. Acts of Service; He does everything for you. He created you, placed you in your home/situation, and forgives you every day.(Psalm 16:5-6) And He uses people to care for you (Jeremiah 26:24)
3. Time; He is with us in our trials and test and always hears our prayers. (Exodus 2:12, Philippians 4:6)
4. Words of Affirmation; then entire Bible shouts out "I love you!" My pastor has been doing a sermon series on Song of Solomon in which God tells His church again and again "I love you." Here's a link to the sermon audio if you want to take a look.  http://www.sermonaudio.com/source_detail.asp?sourceid=faithtillsonburg
5.Gifts; the hugest gift that comes to mind immediately is Jesus. He came, lived with His disciples, died, rose, and went back to heaven. But there are other gifts too; trees, pumpkins, macaroni, dogs, spider webs, socks.

It is undeniable, people are loved by God. The challenge sometimes is to look for ways we are loved. God shows each love language in a variety of different ways. He uses His Word to assure us of His love. He uses people to hug us, pray with us, bake us casseroles, write us cards, watch our kids, share a cup of tea, and sometimes to sit quietly and listen. He uses Creation with it's changing seasons, animals, stars, beach, etc.

Even in the bad days God shows His love. As you trudge through this world ask God to fill up your love-cup. He will. And He will amaze you in the ways He does it. He fills up my love cup in that quiet time that He meets with me as I sit in my comfy chair, Bible in hand. He shows me love when the little girls at church ask me to braid their hair, when my brother asks where I was, when I look at the world changing from pink and blue flowers to red and yellow trees. People will fail to show you love, even your spouse, sister, and best friend, but God will never, ever stop showing you love, because God understands perfectly how you need to be loved. Look for the ways that God loves you; I promise you won't be disappointed.




Food for Thought; it's also interesting to watch other people and discover how they need to be loved. My mom needs gifts, my pastor's wife needs hugs, my friend needs quality time. I would say my top love language is acts of service--gifts and touch are low on the list for me, but in order to show my mother and pastor's wife that I love them I need to give love in the way they understand. Also, remember that people love you even if they show it in their own language and not yours. My pastor's wife gives me a hug every time I see her; this is not my love language but it is hers so I choose to accept it as an "I love you", she's serving me in the way she knows how.



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Maybe It's Supposed to Be Hard

We want a whole, happy, calm life. We want to be healthy. In "crunchie" circles, people use essential oils, grow their own produce, and stop using plastics. In Christian circles, there is an idea, an ideology, gaining ground that presupposes a holistic, restful life is possible if one follows the spiritual disciplines of the desert fathers and mothers. Mysticism. Prayer, scripture, silence, solitude, sabbath, fasting, rest, etc. (If you're looking for a couple interesting reads on this topic you could see these books by Jefferson Bethke and John Mark Comer. ) I want a holistic, happy, balanced life. My kitchen contains wooden cutting boards and loose leaf tea. I begin all my mornings with homemade kombucha, prayer, quiet, and scripture. I do Pilates throughout the week and hold the Lord's Day as holy every Sunday.  And I'm tired. And I'm weary.  And I wonder if that's just how it is in this sin-soaked world as we run to Heaven.  After all, the Spirit tell

4 Ways to Help Single People

It is very likely that not all single people will completely agree with the list I'm about to share with you, because no two people are alike, but I've heard similar things from single people that I follow online and think it will be helpful to share these. If nothing else, let this post lead you to have conversations with the single people in your life and find out what would  be helpful to them.  1. Hug Them I'll admit, I'm not much of a hugger, but a few months ago another woman I follow recommended to her audience that they begin hugging their single friends and I've been thinking about it since. Now (due to a change in my life) I'm seeing certain friends more often than I had been, and I am also receiving more hugs; this is good for me . In particular, it is good for me that one of my guy friends often gives me a hug when I see him. I don't mean that in a sensual sense, I mean it in a brotherly sense. The quick hug he offers tells me that I am seen, I

Being Single is Kind of Like Not Sleeping Through the Night

For as long as you can remember, you have been told that normal people sleep through the night. You've been trained to sleep through the night. The vast majority of your friends sleep through the night. Your entire family sleeps through the night. Everyone at church sleeps through the night. But you don't.  At first, a number of years ago, you were really frustrated about not sleeping through the night, and the frustration was compounded by people consistently asking questions as to your ability to sleep. Have you tried medication? Have you turned all your screens off before bed? Do you exercise? Do you drink caffeine in the afternoon? The fact of the matter is, you do all the things you're supposed to do, but you still wake up in the middle of the night, for apparently no reason.  You're confused and frustrated, so you pray. The next night, when it happens again, you pray. Soon, waking up in the night has changed from a time of frustration to a time of worship and gett